tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7490681017967743184.post2749237342640986670..comments2023-07-30T10:42:33.099-04:00Comments on Only A Mere Woman: Please! Just LISTEN!Unknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger1125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7490681017967743184.post-82641247802918719502012-02-09T20:05:07.263-05:002012-02-09T20:05:07.263-05:00I felt just the same way for awhile before and aft...I felt just the same way for awhile before and after my own wedding. And everyone kept telling me how great it was going to be! I had no married friends my own age, only a mom and grandmas and aunts who, I'm sure, remembered only the good parts. I wish I had had a friend my age who could have told me what I was feeling was normal! Being the first among my friends to get engaged, get married, have a kid, have a second kid ... it's all been really hard, not having someone who understands and has been there.<br /><br />Now I tell all of my friends, when they get engaged, "This is the hard part, it's going to get better." Because engagement IS hard. You're planning to change your entire state of life, almost everything that defines you, and try to meld the life that you've been happy with for all this time with someone else's, and you find that the other person has all kinds of different standards and habits than you do. Meanwhile you're worried that your marriage will be exactly like your parents', and that you will lose the special relationship you have with your family, and that you'll never be a kid again, and that you're only fooling yourself thinking you could ever be happy with this person ... It's a complicated batch of feelings, isn't it? Plus a ton you can't even describe or explain.<br /><br />And then, of course, if you try to explain how you feel to people, either they dismiss it, or tell you that this is definitely a sign that you're having doubts and shouldn't get married. And that's not what it is at all.Sheilahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10853868724554947854noreply@blogger.com