9 Years

 9 years. 5 kids. 1 baby interceding for us before the face of God.

I still prefer his company over anyone else.

I guess you could say it's been a fruitful marriage.

What you don't see, though, is how God has been using our personal pain and brokenness to pour grace into our hearts and bring forth healing. Unity. Safety. 

Safety? Yes, safety. All my life I've felt rejected and ridiculed for being too much, yet not enough. But this man? He is the embodiment of unconditional love. He has seen the depths of my woundedness, and suffered as I've wrestled with my inner agony, more often than not wounding him also in the process. Yet, he's still here. 

He's still here. In spite of my inner darkness, he still holds me and assures me that he will love me forever. No matter what. 

A lifetime of perceived rejection is a formidable obstacle to overcome. Vulnerability and trust do not come easy. Yet, after all these years, after all my unconscious attempts to test him, to push him away, I finally believe him. Here's to forever and a bit, my love.