Only A Mere Woman

I have been feeling overwhelmed lately. For good reason - this summer we made the monumental decision to move states, and the process has been 1. overwhelming like expected, 2. way easier than anticipated in some ways, and 3. way more difficult in others. I have not had much down time, and have been compensating for that by doom scrolling. As one does. Have I mentioned I highly suspect ADHD, with a possible side of Au? *leaves to check archives* It appears I have not. That must have just been a FB post, then. But I do.  [GUESS WHAT! I decided to make a blog post of my FB post, so now it is indeed in the archives. You're welcome.]  Anyway. Most of my off time has been go to bed as soon as the toddler is asleep and get up when the toddler wakes up; or watch cookie or cake decorating videos or scroll 'til I am loopy, go to bed and get up when the toddler wakes up. Either way, the only output I've managed for the past many months has been what it takes to take care of everyone...

       Not all autistic people fit into what our stereotypes of them are. In fact, most of them don't. I have no official diagnosis of either ADHD or Autism/Asperger's, but it was suggested in therapy that my mental processes might be different, and many of the videos by people who are diagnosed as ADHD are more relatable than probably just coincidence. The one thing that really convinced me, though, that perhaps my therapist was right, was this checklist. Most specifically section H, #15. "Feels significantly younger on the inside than on the outside (perpetually twelve)" - that is *exactly* how I feel on the inside. Some days I might feel as old as 18-20, but most days it's 12. Makes acting as an authority figure extremely challenging.      I don't care enough to pursue an official diagnosis of either "disorder" - I'm happy enough to have found an explanation for the alienation I have felt all my life. The labels have brought so much peace for...