Consumption

I have been feeling overwhelmed lately. For good reason - this summer we made the monumental decision to move states, and the process has been 1. overwhelming like expected, 2. way easier than anticipated in some ways, and 3. way more difficult in others. I have not had much down time, and have been compensating for that by doom scrolling. As one does. Have I mentioned I highly suspect ADHD, with a possible side of Au? *leaves to check archives* It appears I have not. That must have just been a FB post, then. But I do. 

[GUESS WHAT! I decided to make a blog post of my FB post, so now it is indeed in the archives. You're welcome.] 

Anyway. Most of my off time has been go to bed as soon as the toddler is asleep and get up when the toddler wakes up; or watch cookie or cake decorating videos or scroll 'til I am loopy, go to bed and get up when the toddler wakes up. Either way, the only output I've managed for the past many months has been what it takes to take care of everyone, especially the past 2 months as my Man has spent half of that fixing up the old house states away, and I've been solo parenting. "Wait! Toddler you say! Since when?" Oh, since 2024. Turned out to be the unexpected answer we didn't know we needed for life. Live kid count is now half a dozen. And now you're all caught up on major life events.

To say I probably have been in serious dopamine deficit would be putting it mildly. And, honestly, I must admit I've been handling the transition well overall, considering my past experience with emotional difficulty after major life changes. But this week was extra tough. And I think the excessive input is finally exacting it's dues. And the best remedy for excessive consumption? Turns out it's creating. Or output. And it doesn't have to be artsy, or wordsy like this. Completing basic tasks that you've put off counts. Addressing that stupid email so it's not taking up brainspace counts. Replying to that comment on your blog after 3 months counts (Sorry, Anonymous!) Doing a little on that project you had to put aside a while ago but now have time for if you're really honest with yourself, well, that counts too. 

It's incredibly hard for me to stop the doom scroll - hence I'm posting past midnight, after "jumping on real quick" to look up a tutorial on how to sew a hem on stretchy fabric because I forgot how over the summer when I put my project down and just now decided to pick it up again. "I'll just check FB real quick..." are famous last words over here. I was able to stop the doom and find the tutorial. Have yet to pick the needle back up because now I'm blogging, but you know. Small steps. And I was able to check reply to comment *and* info blog dump off my list, so slowly working my way a little closer to input-output equilibrium.